I see so many stories under the poly tag of married poly couples dating different partners than their partners. But what about a married couple that wants to date other women together i.e. date the same woman as a couple. That is really what we want long term and I know it won’t be easy..but is it possible to have a triad that just involves the triad?

There are two ways I want to answer this.

One is perhaps less helpful to you, but I think worth saying: There as as many ways to be poly as there are poly people. Who cares if what you want isn’t well represented in the poly tag? Do your thing, find what’s healthy for you, develop practices to make it work, and don’t worry about whether there’s already an established name for it or whatever. Don’t ask me or the internet whether something is possible - you’re ultimately in control of that.

Two: Yes, there is an established practice for what you’re describing. On one end of the spectrum, there’s polyfidelity, where three people all date each other, with the “triad” serving essentially the same function as a “couple” in monogamy. Three people, one relationship. On the other end is “unicorn polyamory,” where a couple seeks partners together, but the relationship is between the couple (as a unit) and the third person.

There are pros and cons to both. And of course there’s an infinite grey area between those two options - like I said above, define what you want and figure out how to go about getting and practicing it in a healthy way. That matters way more than what you call it or what other people are doing and calling it.