So im 13 and pan and recently ive realized that hey im open to poly relationships and i want to have one but i also am open yo mono relationships? Im thinking that i might be poly but i keep asking myself if im too young to know that? and im doubting myself but i really would and want to be in a poly relationship? Idk

When I was thirteen, I was an atheist. Now, I am a person of faith.

When I was thirteen, I had zero interest in sex. My sexuality kicked in at about 19, and now I love sex.

When I was thirteen, I took lots of pride in “not being like other girls.” Now, I embrace my femininity and challenge internalized misogyny.

When I was thirteen, I absolutely loved Fall Out Boy. Now, I still love Fall Out Boy. They are an awesome band.

My point is this: who you are at thirteen is who you are at thirteen. It may not be who you are permanently. And that’s okay! Give yourself room and space to grow. Find a balance between claiming and owning your identity in the present, and not locking yourself into it for the rest of forever.

If you could see yourself in a mono or a poly relationship, that’s great! It could be that you’re one of those people who would be happy and fulfilled in either arrangement. Or, you might explore them both a bit more and find out that one works better for you than the others.

You’re young! Now is the time to experiment. Date people, hang out with people, get to know people. Get to know yourself, too! You don’t have to have everything figured out right now, but you also don’t have to reject any claim to identities because you’re young. Let yourself be you, live your most fulfilling life, and embrace learning and growth.