What does it mean when someone dumps you constantly and then says ‘let’s be friends’ only to turn around and continue acting like you’re still together? :( I don’t know how to talk to them about it because i know they’re going to get upset or give me some lame excuse of 'i love u i just dont want u to go’ but they’re always the one pushing me away and saying they don’t want to be together and they’re the one who doesn’t want anything real. :(
What does it mean? It means this person is jerking you around for their own benefit. They want to do none of the emotional labor of being in a relationship with you, while getting all the benefits.
If an employer told you they don’t want to have you on the payroll, but really like having you around, would you keep doing work there? I know that it can feel gross to think about romantic or intimate relationships in economic terms, but this person is using you in a similarly exploitative manner.
If you are having sex with this person, stop. If you are doing emotional work for this person, stop. They don’t want to be with you, so don’t be with them. They do not get to have their cake and eat it too. Walk away, and find someone who is willing to actually be with you and not be weirdly cryptic and manipulative about it.