I’m really upset right now because I’ve been struggling with the realization that I’m bisexual with a preference towards women. My husband and I are trying to work through it together and I’ve been honest with him about the women I’ve been interested in and how far I want to go with them. My husband is dealing with it but he seems uneasy. I confided to my friend about our issues knowing she’s open minded and her response was to tell me that she’d been cheating on her husband with another man like it was the same thing as what I’m going through. I was raised in a very strict setting and dating straight guys was hard enough for me in itself. Coming out as bi and having to blindly feel my way through this with my husband is hard for us both but we are trying. I told her I don’t agree with what she’s doing and I will not enable her and she guilt tripped me for not going along with it and making her feel better about what she’s doing. I’m just so angry.
It sucks when you reach out to someone for support and they make it entirely about themselves. It sounds like you’re going through a lot of self realization and change, and going about it the right way by being open and communicative with your husband. It’s also healthy to reach out for advice from others, but sometimes doing that gets you burned. There are other places to look to for support and advice beyond your one “open minded” friend who turned out to be a jerk - you’re not alone in this journey.
Your friend is clearly not a good source of advice or support, which is a hard thing to realize about a friend, but this negative experience is a reflection of her issues, not your relationship. Your friend made an insulting assumption and it’s your right to feel insulted. Just because you’re exploring your sexuality doesn’t mean you need to enable or consider choices you consider unhealthy. Your anger with her can be separate from your feelings about these new developments in your relationship and identity.