It feels like being a 18 year old in the poly community is extremely difficult. Like everyone is like super older and it would terrify me to be with some one older then 25. Where do i go?

First off, you are very wise to be wary of dating people much older than you. Younger people very new to a scene and eager to meet people are often seen as easy targets for predatory people, and you are right to be concerned.

It’s true, the “poly community” as an Established Thing tends to skew older, for a whole host of reasons. (The same is often true of the BDSM community in many areas.) Older people tend to be more established where they live, so they are more invested in attending/organizing meetups. Older people tend to be more secure in their public identities, keep to more structured schedules, and for a bunch of other reasons tend to make up the backbone of many ‘official’ communities. 

My advice would be to see the poly community you’re involved in as a source of advice, mentorship, and friends, not a place to find new partners. If you don’t enjoy being around people who are much older than you, or you find that you don’t have much in common with people in your local poly community beyond IDing as polyamorous, you don’t have to hang around with them. Going to poly events or being a card carrying member of whatever poly society is in your area is NOT a qualification for having healthy poly relationships.

Instead, find people around your age to date in communities that aren’t necessarily the established poly community, and be out and open about how you prefer to date. If you have the emotional energy to introduce people to polyamory, this can work pretty well in younger, progressive circles. Keep an annotated copy of More Than Two and/or The Ethical Slut to lend out, and hang out where you’re most likely to meet people you have lots in common with.

I started practicing polyamory at 18, and was never involved in any official poly community. I went to a small liberal college, so I was surrounded by young people with varied attitudes about sex and relationships. I was introduced to polyamory through a partner who lent me a copy of The Ethical Slut, then dated through a network of friends and partners and classmates. I know not everyone has the privilege of spending 4 years surrounded by a bunch of people their age in a social environment where sexual openness and a huge variety of sexual identities is the norm - but if you can find any community that resembles that, go for it. 

Good luck, and be patient! Few people at 18 have found a partner who’s awesome for them, so there’s really no rush.